17 January 2012

[X]POCALYPSE 2012

So we were expecting a blizzard last night.

Didn't happen. Now it's supposed to happen this afternoon, this evening, and tonight.

I'm not happy about this - I was supposed to ride my bike, last night, up to Lake City (have I mentioned that I have a bike that I love dearly? Probably. But I will again soon!) to meet with people, but I took a pass because I was concerned about my ability to get back.

Anyways.

Every touch of ice falling out of the sky out here gets instantly met with hundreds of panicked "SNOWPOCALYPSE [INSERT YEAR]" posts on Facebook, Twitter, and I'd say MySpace but [joke about how MySpace isn't popular anymore].

I find this to be boring and uncreative. SNOWMG is a much better way of greeting the cold wet white stuff (ew), as is "You know what time it is? Get yer fiddle and yer boots, honey, 'cause it's time for a snowdown," and the even-rarer "Time to bust an urban legend, bro - we're visiting Snowpes.com."

...yeah.

Without further ado: here are my top 5 Snowpocalypse / apocalypse / [x]pocalypse puns. Because they've been stuck in my head all day, and I'm not going to be able to do more work until I put them on a page.

Like most things, they work better if you say them in the voice of the "In a world..." guy.

1.
In a world where people expect a blizzard, but nothing happens:
NAHPOCALYPSE 2012.

2.
In a world where a reggae festival invades a conservative Midwestern town:
JAHPOCALYPSE 2012

3.
In a world where solar flares disrupt the world's satellite network, knocking out most of our communications:
RA-POCALYPSE 2012

4.
In a world where zombie sheep have overrun most of New Zealand:
BAAAPOCALYPSE 2012

5.
In a world where there's nothing to do but make lame puns about the way people choose to update their Facebook statuses:
BLAHPOCALYPSE 2012


I'm sorry.

1 comment:

Michelle said...

How about this one?

Tired of hearing everyone whine about the missing snow?

WAHPOCALYPSE 2012.

Also, snowpes.com... Hahahahaha!

<3
Michelle F
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