28 April 2012

The come-to-Jesus email: a genre study

The following is an email I sent to my composition class after I received (or, more accurately, didn't receive) their most recent essay.

From: [email redacted]
To: engl111c_sp12@uw.edu
Subj: What's going on, folks?

Hi y'all -

A few things to think about.

The last three classes, we've had 9, 9, and 6 people present.

The last two essays, 8 and 7 of you have turned them in.

We're through 4 of the texts to be responded to (out of 5), and you've written a total of 6 responses. That's out of (14*4) 56 opportunities. For most of you, it is now impossible to write the two responses that are required of you.

Many of you have missed multiple reading quizzes.

Some of you, I haven't seen in weeks.

What's going on?

I mean, I don't particularly mind y'all not turning in essays. I've got more than enough to do without having to grade, and you're only hurting yourself.

I don't particularly mind y'all not turning in responses. They're meant to help you think through the texts we're working with.

But, c'mon now, it's kind of disrespectful to your classmates, to me (hi, I'm the guy teaching the class, I know some of y'all don't know me), and to the people who couldn't get together the money to come to the UW, for you to not bother doing jack shit in the class you're signed up for.

If you're very far behind... this is the point at which you should think about taking your annual late drop. It'll show up as a W on your transcript, which is a hell of a lot better than a 0.0. If you choose not to do that, you've got a lot of work ahead of you. Time to buckle down.

Good luck.

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